aug 24

don't tell me if you're empty this is how you feel

recreate your art and try and catch some attention
ask me to elaborate, I know you won’t be listening
cyclone around the washing machine, it’s so hard to stay dirty
when cleanliness leads to loneliness, assume something is missing
dry yourself off and see if this is worth saving


it’s revealed, we’re all exposed
we’re more beat up than you know


everyone was on the opposite side, of a bridge implanted with fire
everyone’s heard every breath, every eye shift says it’s tired
i’m imperfect, you’re indifferent, we form the worst possible pair
vulnerability is all i’m made of, i can’t wash it out of my hair
i’m tired of this feeling, please teach a lover how not to care.


i need you the way you don't need me.

aug 21/22

the night owl coos wishing it could get closer to you
with glossy eyes, like the lips of the one that you missed
could you open your window, i don't know how to breathe
we're sucking in our own oxygen, reinventing the people we wish we could've been
and i'm happy.

dont ever walk backwards, people might forget what we did
come sit beside me, we can feel how we did
now everything's different
but i still feel the same
if there's a fork in this road, i hope you'll come my way

the roadmaps are lying, i can't cross this street with ease
your punctuation is lying, you're not as mature as you believe
for forever i was for forgiving, until the day i saw the tracks
imprinted in my shoulders, and all along my back.
but i'm alright.

dont ever walk backwards, people might forget what we did
come sit beside me, we can feel how we did
now everything's different
but i still feel the same
if there's a fork in this road, i hope you'll come my way

i can't talk, and we're still laying in the same spot
you sound the same as you did every other day to me
now you've got something else
but i'll wait all the same
please promise you'll remember my name.
and i'm ok.

dont ever walk backwards, people might forget what we did
come sit beside me, we can feel how we did
now everything's different
but i still feel the same
if there's a fork in this road, i hope you'll come my way

we were not ever normal, and we never will be
not laying in imprints, not ever running back to this
breathe deeply when you're confronted

aug 17

i stood behind bulletproof glass
and you were target practice for my speech
and I positioned you on the other side
where you watched my sentences puddle at your feet
i don’t really know anything about being like you
and I never thought that recycling and forgiveness went hand in hand
the same way everything you ever said was tongue in cheek
the same way you felt before we played tongues and cheeks

it's not like me to dig in the dirt
scrubbing bones just so i feel a little less
or maybe it's so i can feel a bit more
if there's something to rely on, it's already gone, i'm sure.
you cant expect a firecracker to go off without notice
just like you cant expect a bomb to solve everything that makes you scared
the thing that keeps you up at night should never be replaced
you were all that kept me up at night so look me in the face
i want you to write it on my lips that it wasn't for the chase
im begging you to try and tell me the feelings were never the same

if i walked backwards for eight hundred blocks
we could meet again and have better intentions
and i wouldn't have spent
two whole years
counting the cents/sense i've lossed

heha. august 4th

you cleaned off your slate before i even began on mine.
i guess we're both too late, i know i run from the time
because when the hour hand swivels it's drawn a line
a boundary that stops me from taking a hint
because it's too busy trying to smother my lips;.

click click's gone the switch that's turned my lights off
the butterflies in my brain have stopped stirring it up
words curved in footprints at your spot, yeah you're spotted
have no impact on me, you were never really what i wanted.

i sat your feet, chained your legs, we've never ever been even
with your casual ignorance you altered everything i believed in
now you're raveled in something else i can't hope you will succeed in
because you deserve to sit on the receiving end for a while
no, i don't want to see you hurt, but right now i don't want to see your smile.

click click's gone the switch that's turned my lights off
the butterflies in my brain have stopped stirring it up
words curved in footprints at your spot, yeah you're spotted
have no impact on me, you were never really what i wanted.

i thought i felt you breathing through your teeth
but you decided we were never that close
and when you said i was important
i never realized i had to take a number.


click click's gone the switch that's turned my lights off
the butterflies in my brain have stopped stirring it up
words curved in footprints at your spot, yeah you're spotted
have no impact on me, you were never really what i wanted.

it's been too long. july 24

it's been twenty four days
can you count twenty four days
since i've cared enough about what you've slurred
and you haven't changed your ways

what do you do when your inspiration
is something you don't know how to deal with
and what was once dead air in my ears
is now dead air in my sight

you've broken me
i forget how to write.

june 29th, 08

i have so many emeralds stuck in my throat.
you've got so many rock falling out of your mouth.
heavy machinery wheels grind words whenever anybody talks
we always fall victim to the weight of these rocks.
i am no good at any of this.
i thought you were too good for any of this.
but you are no good at any of this.

i would crawl to the sun if it meant i would come out brighter
you would sit on the moon if the heat was too much
the grooves that you've slept in will never compare to your skin's texture
so don't squint your eyes, you're words pour out of more than light fixtures.
nobody can be good at this.
we will never be good at this
one of us needs to be good at this.

i could sleep between blue lines if you would ever join me
you would hide behind red ones if you it meant you weren't revealed.
blank looks and blank sheets, all agree they've got nothing
i hope that one day you'll get your tongue back for somethhing.
i'm trying so hard to be good at this.

june 22nd.

it's unnatural for my back not to be broken
from carrying the weight of everything i've ever known.
and from all the times you've walked across it
but the truth is i bury all of my broken bones
you never asked permission to dig what i bought for you
into the grooves between shoulder blades
every single feeling i've ever felt for you
you've smashed between my vertebrae

don't ask for a heart you don't know how to keep
cause i'm sick of having to find it for you
and i've tried for too long to hold it up
so slide your hands down and feel what you've caused to sink.

somehow you've slipped something inside of my greens and blues
i didn't think that your diction could get under my skin
and now red is getting darker because of the ink from your words
and you've pumped regrets in my brain that i've begged not to go in
you never asked permission to break what i've been holding
i never even told you that you'd have to try
now every single feeling i've ever felt for you
is smeared town the pathways trailing out of my eyes.

don't ask for a heart you don't know how to keep
cause i'm sick of having to find it for you
and i've tried for too long to hold it up
so slide your hands down and feel what you've caused to sink.

you were at the top of my lungs.
who knew two syllables could set me off.